Revelations
by Finex
Summary: It wasn't a breakthrough revelation that Jack would remember for the rest of his life  however long that might be . It was a simple fact, a fact that he had pushed to the back of his mind when the ship first hit the iceberg. He was going to die.


**Not everything in here is going to be accurate, because this is all based off of my memory of the movie. Please forgive any mistakes.**

**Disclaimer: The Titanic and any of its characters/plot does not belong to me**

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><p>Jack knew he was going to die.<p>

It wasn't a sudden thought, it wasn't a breakthrough revelation that he would remember for the rest of his life (however long that might be). It was a simple fact, a fact that he had pushed to the back of his mind when the ship first hit the iceberg. As soon as the jarring motions rocked the ship, and the bottom of the Titanic had been ripped open like a tin can, he knew he was going to die.

Jack had never been a pessimistic or an optimistic person. He had just taken what life handed him, and never really thought about the future. He traveled where he wanted to, did what he wanted to, and never allowed himself to get tied down to anyone or anything. He surprised himself when he reached the conclusion that he was going to die, knowing that he never thought that anything was half-empty or half-full.

He supposed he had the right to be pessimistic. He had boarded the Titanic- the greatest boat in the world, with new hope and a new future. He met the love of his life, experienced moments he never wanted to forget, and saw sights he never wanted to fade. But that was going to be all ripped away from him, just because of an iceberg and too few emergency boats.

So he could rave and scream, complain and yell, whine and cry all he wanted. But nothing was going to change the fact that the ship was sinking, and his life was going to end.

But Jack didn't _want _his life to end. He used to be able to count what he was thankful for on one hand, but now he had to use both his calloused hands. Still not a lot, compared to the wealthy first class passengers on the boat, who probably had to use both hands, both feet, and maybe two other people's appendages to list all they were thankful for. Well, maybe not what they were thankful for. What they had, maybe, and what no one else had.

For a while all he was thankful for was being alive. Not that he had been in any life-or-death situations, but he had realized that he could have died long ago, from hundreds of different incidents. So he had been thankful he was alive, he had a friend, and he could draw, for how little it earned him.

Soon, he became thankful for getting the tickets for the Titanic. Next, he was thankful he got onto the ship in time. So that was one hand of being thankful. And he supposed that was all he needed.

But then he met Rose. Stupid, stupid Rose, who risked everything and anything she could have had for him. He really had nothing to lose, so Jack found it unfair that she would have to sacrifice so much for him; a low, poor man, who could barely afford anything, and who could count what he was thankful for on one hand. He knew he loved her just as much as she loved him, so why didn't he have to give up as much as she did?

He knew the answer. He didn't have anything to give up. He would willingly give up his friend he grew apart from, however cruel as that seemed. He couldn't get rid of his ability to draw, the tickets for the Titanic were worthless, and he was already on the boat.

The only things he could give up where his life, Rose, and his love for Rose.

Jack knew that he would give his life up for Rose any day. But he would never give up Rose as long as he was alive, and his love for Rose would live on forever, whether he did or not.

He had told Rose once, about how he felt about not having to give anything up for her as she did for him. She had laughed, shook her head, and kissed him on the lips. "Jack," she had chided. "You never had to give anything up for me. Just being there for me is more than anything you could give away."

It was sappy and corny, and Jack had made a face after that statement. That earned him a playful slap, but he figured it was a slap of love (one way or another). But he had later reassured her that he believed her, and reminded Rose that he would always be there for her, whether she liked it or not. Rose proceeded to tell him that _he _was the sap, and they had erupted in a tickle fight not too long after. It was childish, but Jack was thankful they weren't caught, because he knew he would get in a lot of trouble if he was seen "raping" Rose again.

So that night, Rose's cheesy words in his head, Jack had used a sheet of his drawing paper and wrote down all he was thankful for. He presented the paper to Rose the next day, and said that he was thankful for what he had, including her. He said that ever since he met her, he made her think about what he had and what he would never give up, because he loved what he had more than anything in the world.

Rose looked like she wanted to cry, so Jack deemed it a good time to give her a quick kiss on the cheek and walk off, hands in his pockets innocently. He was nervous, thinking he had been too strong on her, knowing that he just indirectly told her he loved her more than anything in the world (other than the other things he was thankful for).

And that was true. He did love her more than anything in the world. She made him look at the world differently, and she made him a better person than he had ever been. She was amazing, perfect, beautiful, clever, smart, funny…

Jack wrote down a list of everything he loved about her, just to pass the time. He carried the sheet of paper around with him, and looked at it every time he doubted that his love was genuine. He was afraid of thinking that he loved Rose and then realizing that he only loved her on the outside, and on the inside she was just another girl. But no matter how many times he thought about it, Jack always knew his love was genuine. He was just worried that Rose wouldn't like him after his huge confession.

Needless to say, the next day Jack was shocked when she ran up to him and kissed him full on the lips, right in front of a crowd of passengers. Shocked, but pleased, Jack pulled her into a random room, demanding to know just what she thought she was doing. She gave him a folded piece of paper, and winked. She left the room innocently, imitating Jack from the day before.

The paper was a list of things that Rose was thankful for, Jack being number one and written in bold and underlined many times. Jack was pretty sure he grinned like an idiot for the rest of the day.

Jack gave Rose his sheet of paper that had everything he loved about her on it, and he reminded her to look at it any time she felt upset or sad, or considered hanging off the end of a boat. Not that she was planning to do it again anytime soon.

So began their tradition of note-passing. Every other day, they would both write a small note or list, something that would cheer or reassure the other about their love. It was a humbling experience for both of them, and they grew even closer over that period of time, not going unnoticed by Rose's family.

But no matter what, they continued to love each other, and Jack was back to counting what he was thankful for on one hand, for he had realized that he was only thankful for one thing, and one thing only.

Rose.

So, of course, his life had to end when it was just becoming the best thing that had ever happened to him. Jack figured that it was Fate's way of slapping him in the face, or God's way of saying his luck was over. Either way, he was going to be taken away from Rose, and that was all he cared about.

He never told Rose he knew he was going to die. She wouldn't have believed him anyway, Jack reflected. She would have said he was superstitious, stupid; the captain was smart and knew what to do. And if he even _tried_ jumping off the end of the boat there were going to be consequences (Jack figured he couldn't be punished more than dying, but he never said that to her).

Death didn't even seem to occur to Rose until half the boat was underwater. Jack didn't know exactly when she realized Death was paying the Titanic a visit, but when she discovered him handcuffed to a pipe in a flooding room, he saw the realization and fear in her eyes.

Jack had thought he was going to die in the handcuffs. He didn't think it was fair, considering he was being blamed for a crime he didn't do. It was barbaric, being trapped in a room like an animal, knowing he was going to die alone and without a chance to escape. He knew he was going to die, but he had thought it would be a lot more _peaceful._

Jack had rubbed his wrists raw trying to get out of the cuffs, not because he wanted to escape death, but because he wanted to say goodbye to Rose. He wasn't about to die without telling her that he loved her, because he realized he had never directly told Rose he loved her, and that was a problem that had to be fixed before he died.

So it was an absolute miracle when he heard her calling his name down the hall. Angels must have been watching over him, because just when he was prepared to give up, he was given hope again. It was fairly traumatic, escaping from the handcuffs, but deciding between losing a hand or his life, Jack preferred to lose his hand. But he trusted Rose, and it paid off, because he was free without the loss of a limb.

Jack still knew he was going to die, but he was reassured by knowing he would die in the company of Rose. There was no other way he wanted to leave the world.

…and he was back to the corny sayings.

But no matter how cheesy it was, Jack knew deep in his heart that Rose was the only thing that was keeping him from just letting go. They had escaped the sinking ship, against all odds; faced bullets, hundreds of gallons of water, handcuffs, and locked doors, all to end out in the peaceful ocean (or as peaceful as it could get with hundreds of people screaming and dying).

He had considered letting go, when the ship had sucked him down into the water. Ironically, he was afraid of Rose letting go of his hand, but he really let go of hers. Being sucked down towards the bottom of the ocean was the closest Jack had gotten to death since the handcuff incident, and he wasn't about to give up when he still had Rose to think about.

So he had fought against the water that was pulling him down, strained with all the strength he had left, and almost drowned. But he fought harder than he ever had in his life, and it paid off. Escaping death took care of his first worry, but finding Rose was the next. He was terrified that she had gotten lost, wandered off, and would die alone.

He would be damned before Rose died alone.

Jack accepted the fact that most likely, Rose was going to die as well. Along with the hundreds of other passengers on the ship, there was just no way that they could all live. It was a painful thought, but he was slightly reassured that they would all meet up in Heaven.

They _had _to meet in heaven, because Jack would be damned if Rose went anywhere other than the most prestigious place in her afterlife. She deserved it, after all. Jack was sure that Rose was the most beautiful, sweetest, kindest, loving girl in the entire world. She deserved nothing less than the best.

"Jack!"

A scream, hysterical and frightened, broke Jack out of his reverie. Swimming through the below-freezing water as fast as he could, he desperately tried to locate Rose. As he swam, people all around him screamed and cried, shaking with cold and fear. A few tried to grab onto him as he swam past, but he ignored them, shrugging them off harshly.

"Jack!"

Jack paused, locating the source of the screams and found Rose, clutching onto some sort of piece of wood, half of her body in the water, half of it out. She was shaking, clutching onto the wood so tightly her fingers were white (though the color of her fingers could be because of the temperature).

"I'm right here Rose," he managed to gasp out, swimming over tiredly. He grabbed onto the edge of the wood, facing across from Rose. The relief on her face made his heart swell with love, and he struggled to compose himself so he wouldn't look as exhausted and as cold as he felt. "I'm right here."

Rose looked like she was about to cry, but Jack didn't blame her. He was terrified as well, but he held his emotions back, and just looked into her eyes, trying to be as soothing as possible. "It'll be morning soon," he reassured. "There'll be rescue crews out soon. Just hold on a little longer." Jack was aware of how weak his voice sounded, but he didn't care any longer. All he cared about was that he was with Rose.

"Just a little longer Rose," Jack repeated. He smiled at her, and despite their shivering, breaths coming in short gasps, and the screams around them, Rose smiled back. The floated in silence for awhile, Jack loosing feeling in his legs completely, and the temperature of the water surrounding him slowly creeping inside of him. Feeling weaker than he ever had in his life, Jack just focused on breathing, desperately trying to keep his heart beating.

"I love you Jack," Rose said, her voice almost a whisper. Jack paused, caught by surprise, his heart swelling to twice its size. But his good mood faded almost immediately as he realized what she was doing.

"No. Don't you do that. Don't you say your good-byes," Jack said fiercely. "You're going to get out of here. You're going to go on, and you're going to make lots of babies, and watch them grow. You're going to die an old, old lady, warm in your bed. Not here. Not this night. Do you understand me?"

Rose was silent.

Jack kept on talked, desperate, furious, trying to make Rose understand that she couldn't give up. He stumbled out something about how meeting her and getting on the Titanic was the best thing he had ever done, and he was thankful, but his brain seemed to be working in slow motion, and after he said something, he forgot it right after.

"You must do me this," Jack said, his voice suddenly strong. "You must promise me that you'll survive, that you won't give up...no matter what happens…no matter how hopeless it seems. Promise me now, Rose, and never let go of that promise."

Rose looked at him, and even in the dark he could see her crying. "I promise," Rose said shakily, her breath coming out as white steam.

"Never let go of that promise," Jack said, grabbing her hand.

"I'll never let go Jack. I'll never let go," Rose said after a pause, her voice softening. Her eyes were wide, and she looked so frightened; so scared that all Jack wanted to do was hold her and comfort her, but he couldn't do that at that moment.

Jack smiled, relaxing slightly and resting his head on the wood Rose was floating on. "I…I love you too Rose," he managed to say, his voice weak. But despite his weakness, the meaning and emotion behind his words was stronger than anything he had said before. Rose might have said something in response, or maybe it was just the wind whispering, but Jack could focus on nothing but the cold.

Jack had heard about death, and he had heard it was light, blinding, bright light, that was warm and loving, and guided you into heaven. His father long ago had told him when it was his time, the light would beckon him into heaven, and it would be peaceful and warm.

When Jack was dying, it felt nothing like that.

First of all, there was no light. It was pitch black all around him, and no light came to greet him and beckon him into heaven. There was no warmth; only bitter cold and numbness, and the feeling of…nothing. Jack felt like he was leaving his body completely. His muscles went completely lax, and his heart beat slower and slower. Darkness crept in on his vision, blacking everything out, and Jack wanted to scream.

This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. Dying was supposed to be bright, warm, happy peaceful…instead Jack was terrified, unable to move or do anything. With more effort than Jack had put into any movement in his life, he managed to tilt his head and glimpse Rose. He managed to realize that this was the last time he would see her. He opened his mouth, desperately trying to say three words that meant more than anything he had ever said before.

Jack let out a wheeze, his heart struggling to beat hard enough to bring oxygen to his lungs, but his heart failed him, sputtering out like a dying engine. Jack managed to tilt his head slightly away from Rose, not wanting her to see him when he was…dead. It was still hard to latch onto the fact that he was dying, but he knew that it was unavoidable. Closing his eyes, Jack finally gave in, slumping onto the wood.

_Fine, _he thought weakly. _I give in. But please…spare Rose from death. Let her live to be an old woman, and have lots and lots of children and die happy and safe…_

Jack had no idea who he was pleading to, but he prayed to anyone out there, anyone, to make sure that Rose would be okay.

Sighing out his last breath with the last sputtering beat of his heart, Jack died, letting the darkness close in on him. The last image etched into his mind was of Rose; smiling and laughing, her face alive with childish happiness.

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><p><strong>THIS IS A MONSTER OF A ONE-SHOT. Maybe not to some other talented authors, but to me this is a BEAST. I hope you enjoyed, because this took me about two months to write, on and off. Stop by and leave a review! :)<strong>


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